I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize