you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
