omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
