so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize