how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
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He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
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Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
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