Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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