I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Randomize
