hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
There's a naked man in my car right now.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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