i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
