I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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