Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
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I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
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just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
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