The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
we're making bets on your personal life
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
There r osticjed everywhere
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
