R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
