This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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