her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
