Ambien. No doubt about it.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
