we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
