im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
