uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Randomize
