Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
These 27 People Had No Idea What They Were Doing When It Came To Sex
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!