So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Randomize
