I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I am puke
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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