The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Randomize
