just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
