you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
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