her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I had to cum in my sink.
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