is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
