so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
