Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
