There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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