Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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