she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
