woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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