My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize