apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
