How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize