her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
