Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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