Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize
