Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize