this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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