If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
What a dumb baby whore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Randomize