It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
