Dual....:-)
I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
tell me about the eggs
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
