I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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