we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize