It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
Randomize
