Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
