Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
