Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
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